Thursday, November 19, 2015

FanDuel NFL Week 11 - Fuck, Marry, Kill

Scott Freakin' Overfield.

In case you didn't know, he's the dude from Lawrence, KS who took 2nd place on #NotFanDuel and won $438,000 last week. 

When I heard the news, I immediately thought this dude was my new hero! An amateur daily fantasy player from the heartland who hit it big, shoving it in the face of everybody who said only professionals and robots win the big tournaments.

But then I listened to him on 610 with Parkins and C-dot. And I learned this was his first time playing. And he wasn't even tracking his lineup on Sunday night. And he's in last place in his season long league. And his strategy going forward was to play the same lineup that he just won big with. BITTER BEER FACE! (always remembered this as a Foster's commercial, but it's actually a mid-90's Keystone ad.)

The great news for chumps like us? His lineup wasn't even that great. He had Tyler Eifert (3-26) and Marvin Jones (4-44) on his squad. A good reminder that your team doesn't have to be perfect. You just need to hit on a few guys that not many people will be on. And that's my ticket to buying my own island.
On to the Week 11 FMK's (find an older post for FMK explanations)...

***If you're new to FanDuel, follow this link and click the yellow tab in the top right corner, and put in promo code DIRK to get special savings and make me monies***

Enter The Milhouse League for Week 11 on FanDuel


Fuck - Mark Sanchez ($6400) - It's an NFL backup QB world, we're all just renting space. Sanchez, Brock Osweiler, Alex Smith and Case Keenum are all viable plays this week (I got jokes). But I expect Sanchez to be better than Samuel Bradford. He definitely was last season, when he was the 8th best fantasy QB after taking over for an injured Nick Foles.

Marry - Derek Carr ($7700) - Last week, I was almost exclusively Brady/Rodgers. This week, the top QB's all have question marks. And, unfortunately, the best QB in the NFL isn't playing this week (because the Saints defense won't be taking the field). Meanwhile, Carr has averaged 306 yards and 3.25 TD's his last four weeks, against much better competition than the Lions.

Kill - Tom Brady ($9200) - Interesting spot, but I think I'm staying away. When the Patriots played the Bills in Week 2, Brady dropped back 61 times, while they ran it only 10 times. But New England has now lost their LT, slot WR, and passing game RB. I fear it's possible we see a shift in strategy, but I still might squeeze Brady in a lineup or two.

Facebook pokes - Matthew Stafford, Alex, Case Keenum ($4800!!!)

Running Back

Fuck - Darren McFadden ($6800) - Great chance for a bounce back week here. McFadden burned a lot of people in a surprisingly tough matchup with the Bucs last week, so he might be low owned this week. Run DMc still played 44 of 50 snaps, while the other 6 went to Christine Michael, who just got cut. The Dolphins have the 31st ranked run D, and Tony Romo returns to open up even bigger holes for the league's best OL.

Marry - Adrian Peterson ($8900) - He's heating up! AP has torched the Raiders and Rams the past few weeks, both of which have/had decent run defenses. Now he gets a more favorable matchup in a huge game at home. However, the more shrewd move may be Gurley or Devonta Freeman, since they'll be less owned. Something I always look for on Fridays is ownership %'s from FanDuel's Thursday night leagues. It gives you a good idea of what to expect on Sunday. I used this dude's at Daily Fantasy Cafe and this dude's at RotoCurve. Big help for tournament plays.

Kill - DeMarco Murray ($7600) - The Buccaneers have allowed 3.2 ypc and 0 TD's over their last 4 weeks. They join my list of run defenses to shy away from - Jets, Falcons, Broncos, Jaguars, Seahawks, Steelers, Patriots and now the Bucs.

Facebook pokes - Gurley, Freeman, Chris Ivory, Charcanye West (heavy dosage), Jonathan Stewart, Latavius Murray

Wide Receiver

Fuck - Danny Amendola ($6000) - Curious to see his ownership this week, but he's almost a must start. The Patriots' gameplan last meeting with the Bills was quick, short passes. That meant Dion Lewis and Julian Edelman (combined for 17 catches), but both are both now injured. Amendola is the next Wes Welker Type up, which is essentially the Patriots' new mantra.

Marry - Calvin Johnson ($8100) - The Raiders' pass defense is a joke. Not much more to say here. If I'm not playing McFadden in a lineup, I'll probably be on Dez Bryant.

Kill - Julio Jones / DeAndre Hopkins / AJ Green ($8200-9100) - Some touch matchups for the elite WR's of 2015. Julio draws Vontae Davis. Hopkins draws Darrelle Revis. Green draws Patrick Peterson. Julio is a possibility, but I wouldn't touch the other two.

Facebook pokes - Dez, Mike Evans, Brandon Lafell, Davante Adams (21 targets last week!), Michael Crabtree (heavy dosage), Kamar Aiken, Stevie Johnson, Chris Givens (still the minimum!)

Tight End

Gronk - Jacob Tamme ($5300) - 22 targets over the last two weeks. No, I didn't know he was still in the league either.

Marry - Gronk ($8400) - Oh, that 76 yard TD was glorious last week. Won me some $$$. Again, without Edelman and Lewis, the remaining Patriots are all strong plays this week.

Kill - Antonio Gates ($5900) - Still banged up and the Chiefs have allowed the fewest fantasy points to TE's in 2015.

Facebook pokes - Greg Olsen, Jordan Reed, Eric Ebron, Crockett Gillmore, Martellus Bennett


Fuck - Dangerous Dan Bailey ($4600) - Two weeks in a row I'm spending the extra $100 on my low-level kicker. You wanna get nuts? LET'S GET NUTS.

Marry - Steven Hauschka ($5000) - 2+ field goals in 7 of 9 games. Seahawks should run through the 49ers, leading to plenty of chances.

Kill - Matt Prater ($4500) - Missed two XP's last week, which almost kept the 24 year winless streak at Lambeau intact, in the most Lions way possible.


Fuck - Chiefs ($4400) - FanDuel continues to Rodney Dangerfield KC's defense. Points allowed last 5 weeks: 18, 16, 13, 10, 13. Fantasy points scored last 5 weeks: 11, 7, 12, 14, 19. Giddy up.

Marry - Jets ($4700) - Everybody will be on the Seahawks at home against the 49ers. I'll save my $700 and take the Mean Green against TJ Yates. 

Kill - Goodell Got It Right! Goodell Got It Right! Nobody's favorite segment returns this week due to zero demand. This week? I dunno if I'd say Goodell got it right, per se. But I'm tired of the generic complaint of 2015: "Nobody knows what a catch is anymore." Just about every sports personality has tweeted that at some point this football season. We get it. Shaddup. It's almost as played out as the MJ crying face (ok, not even close - PLEASE STOP). And nobody ever offers a viable solution. Two feet down with possession isn't the answer, because then everything would be a catch. It's a pure judgment call, which is weird, because most judgment calls aren't suitable for replay. But this one is. And it's tough. All that being said, Dez caught it.

Facebook pokes - Bucs, Ravens, Panthers, Eagles, Seahawks

My #1 FanDuel Lineup

QB - Derek Carr
RB - Charcandrick West
RB - Darren McFadden
WR - Calvin Johnson
WR - Michael Crabtree
WR - Danny Amendola
TE - Rob Gronkowski
K - Dan Bailey
DEF - Jets

***If you're new to FanDuel, follow this link and click the yellow tab in the top right corner, and put in promo code DIRK to get special savings and make me monies***

Enter The Milhouse League for Week 11 on FanDuel

Just one thing, Dude - do you have to use so many cuss words?

His Dirkness

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

KU Basketball Thoughts

College Basketball in November is a little bit like eating a bowl of hot chili outside in July. However, yesterday's bowl of chili was super delicious.

If I were to continue with this analogy, then Michigan St's Darnell Valentine would have to be considered head chef. He was incredible last night. Better than Billy Ray Valentine slingin' pork rinds to Clarence Beeks.

Admission: Point forward types are my favorite basketball players to watch. Royce White. Boris Diaw. Blake Griffin. Anthony Mason back in the day. Georges Niang today.

My guys, Parkins and C-Dot led off their Monday show with how College Basketball is lacking quality. It sure wasn't last night. And a lot of the rule changes seemed positive as well. Shorter shot clock. A fewer timeout. Shorter timeouts. An evolved take on commercials. Everything sped the game up.

On to Kansas. They lost the game, but I thought they showed well. They have enough talent to cut down any and all nets in March, even without The Mali Popper, Cheick Diallo.

Experience in the backcourt + Talent in the frontcourt = Recipe for success in March.


Devonte' Graham - Went 1-9 last night and I still loved his performance. No need to ask Granny, this kid is spry. He's very heady, always calm and in control. Exactly what you want from a point guard. And the best part? He should be a four year player, which means three more seasons with him. My favorite player.

Frank Mason III - The second PG in the starting lineup, a strategy I think I like. KU can continually swing the ball around the perimeter and still have a natural PG running the show. This is a dynamic duo that should lead to an entertaining brand of basketball this season.

Wayne Selden - He's never done it for me. This coming from a guy who never stopped loving Tyshawn Taylor or Elijah Johnson. So this isn't your typical KU fan angst. Selden is kind of average at everything, which makes him a natural role player (I could see him being a better pro than college player). He's a 4th or 5th option on offense, who should be a better defender. Honestly, I'd prefer to see Brannen Greene in the game at crunch time to add spacing, unless there's a bigger guard who only Selden can match up with (and even then, ehh).

Svetlana Mele Kalikimaka - That dude has....a lot of confidence? Not sure what to make of him yet.


Perry Ellis - A monster who gets a bad wrap. I guess he's kinda soft and is capable of getting intimidated. Can freeze up. But appreciate him for what he is - a relentless scorer down low. I've never seen him more aggressive around the basket then he was last night. Reminds me of Pau Gasol (with the way he's perceived) and Darrell Arthur (with his ability to get buckets). Also, good to see him developing his outside game, which is his ticket to the NBA.

Carlton Bragg Jr. - That boy gangly. Has the body type to develop into a lockdown defender (who could take Selden's place, in my scenario, if he's quick enough to hang with small forwards - remains to be seen). Banged a few jumpers too, he's a guy to keep an eye on.

Jamari Traylor and Landon Lucas - Just a couple of guys, who can eat up space, rebound, play solid defense, and utilize 10 fouls. They are interchangeable, in my opinion.

Honestly, I didn't care much about the loss, but I'm not nearly as hardcore as I was when I went to KU. And I prefer to take a laissez-faire attitude with them, because KU fans can be a should I say this -- Self-serious? Get it? Because of Bill, you guys.

I tend to watch KU non-conference games with one eye open, and the other eye on the future. I have no problem dropping a few games before New Year's if it helps the team's development come March -- Or even conference season, to help the team extend one of the more impressive streaks I've seen in sports in my lifetime.

All praise Andrea Hudy,

His Dirkness

Thursday, November 12, 2015

FanDuel NFL Week 10 - Fuck, Marry, Kill

The FMK's are back!

We've been MIA the last few weeks, but in case you didn't hear, Kansas City won a real life professional sports title!

However, apparently I was way off on what kinda party you're supposed to throw when your city wins a championship - This is all so new to me. So while it's somewhat embarrassing to be 1 of only 3 people arrested during the ensuing melee, yanno, no ragrets, YOLO, etc.

On to the Week 10 FMK's (find an older post for FMK explanations)...

***If you're new to FanDuel, follow this link and click the yellow tab in the top right corner, and put in promo code DIRK to get special savings and make me monies***

Enter The MILHOUSE League for Week 10 on FanDuel


Fuck - Eli Manning ($7400) - Anybody else feel like Giants v. Patriots might be the best rivalry in the NFL right now? New England has owned the last 12 years of the NFL. The Giants are the one team who's stood up to them, winning the last three, two of which were Super Bowls. The Patriots' last win came in their 16-0 season finale clincher. They've played big time games that are always close. And Belichick, Brady, Coughlin, Eli are all still sitting at the heads of the table.

Here's a fun one for you - The last two times the Patriots and Giants played in the regular season, they ended up meeting again in the Super Bowl. And here we are, with the Patriots sitting at 8-0 and the Giants leading the NFC East. Just saying.

Marry - Aaron Rodgers ($9200) - If you missed his 4th quarter last week, you basically missed How Stella Got Her Groove Back 2. Your loss. This feels like a week where he might go off. The Lions are terrrrrrible. I'm calling my shot. The now less likable A-Rod throws 5 TD's this week.

Kill - Alex Smith ($6000) - I wanted to draw attention to the QB's who cost more than Alex on FanDuel this week - Kirk Cousins, Nick Foles, Josh McCown, Matt Cassel, Landry Jones, Johnny F. and Zach Mettenberger. Whew. I actually don't mind the play. I'd much rather spend the $6000 than $17M per.

Facebook pokes - Bom Trady, Mathias Stafford, Brian Hoyer, You Like That Cousins - good, cheap options this week

Running Back

Fuck - LaGarrette Blount ($6900) - Two FD strategies strong at play here. Taking advantage of an injury (Dion Lewis). And cashing in on a potential shootout. I'd say a good chance Blount plays the majority of the snaps and finds the end zone atleast once. Darren McFadden at $7000 is a close second, I love them both this week.

Marry - Todd Gurley III ($9200) - I like the elite plays this week. TGIII gets the Bears on a short week, at home, against a soft run defense in a must win game. Don't worry, I'll save you some money at WR in a bit.

Kill - Justin Forsett ($7100) - I expect a lot of people on him this week - coming off a bye, against a weak opponent at home. Here's my stat for you - The Jags lead the NFL in ypc allowed (by a wide margin actually) at 3.2 ypc. Very hard to run on them, just ask Chris Ivory, who ran 23 times for 26 yards last week.

Facebook pokes - DeMarco Murray, DeAngelo Williams (questionable), McFadden, Jeremy Hill (tournament)

Wide Receiver

Fuck - Chris Givens ($4500) - Ohhhh yeah, a Dirkness living in your parents' basement salary special!!! This one needs to be monitored, mind you. But Steve Smith is done (gold jacket, green jacket - I give a shit). The Ravens are down to Kamar Aiken, Marlon Brown and Givens at WR. The Jags shut down the run, but can't stop the pass. There are stories in Baltimore this week about Flacco's growing chemistry with Givens. The Ravens' website promoted Givens to starting WR. Put me down for 100 yards or a TD from Givens, or everybody reading this gets their money back (from this article, not their FanDuel league).

Marry - DeAndre Hopkins ($8900) - I love me a nice 21-3 deficit at halftime for a WR I'm playing. Makes for a ton of garbage yard opportunities against soft coverages. Texans at Bengals bodes well for Nuke. Calvin Johnson is in a similar situation this week - IF he's ruled 100% healthy.

Kill - Odell Beckham Jr. ($8800) - I know. It seems so tasty. Nice and buttered up for ya. But Belichick has this thing. He likes to take away the opponents' top weapon. I'd almost expect a straight double team on every snap. Which means, he's gonna make Rueben Randle or Dwayne Harris or Shane Vereen beat them. I expect one of those three to go off, and will be playing mostly Randle from the NYG's.

Facebook pokes - AJ Green, Randall Cobb, Allen Robinson (if Hurns sits, a must play), Jarvis Landry, Michael Crabtree, Brandon Lafell, Kamar Aiken (safer than Givens)

Tight End

Gronk - Jordan Reed ($5800) - Fell victim to the Belichick shutdown last week. Great spot for him. The Saints allow the 2nd most points to TE's. There will be blood (points scored).

Marry - Gronk ($8000) - HOW YA GET THE BEANS ABOVE THE FRANK? Listen to me. Play Gronk this week. He was quiet last game. They're headed for a shootout. The Giants allow the 3rd most points to TE's. Gronk if you're ornery.

Kill - Every other TE - I could see Olsen or Eifert. I think Kelce catches a lot of short passes against Denver. But I'd highly recommend Reed or Gronk this week.

Facebook pokes - No soup for you.


Fuck - Mike Nugent ($4600) - Admission: I love the $4500 kicker. I'm always trying to spend all of my salary with one. But I'm spending up this week, baby. Lets get crazy!!!

Marry - Stephen Gostkowski ($5100) - Connected on 2+ field goals in every game since the season opener. He hasn't missed an extra point either.

Kill - Nick Folk - What kind of a kicker gets hurt before actually kicking anything? I trotted this dude out in daily and season long leagues last week. Calculated out, he owes me like 8 bucks.


Fuck - Chiefs ($4300) - Allowing 14.3 ppg their last four games, best in the NFL. And, at this rate, Peyton is gonna break the career INT record (89 more) before he breaks the record for career passing yards (2 more).

Marry - Bengals ($5000) - Allowed 10 points each of their last two games. Getting Brian Hoyer at home on MNF. Good spot.

Kill - Roger Goodell. It's time for Goodell Got It Right! I've already covered NFL Overtimes and Thursday Night Football. This week, it's the London games! Sign me up for 8:30am kickoffs every Sunday. I'd much rather watch that then hear NFL analysts discuss the trials and tribulations of domestic violence. I'm totally down with the NFL going to 17 games, with every team playing a game overseas. Takes away the disadvantage of playing a home game in London, expands the game globally, and hey, an extra week of football! Lets do this, Rodge.

Facebook pokes - Bucs, Panthers, Packers, Rams

My #1 FanDuel Lineup

QB - Aaron Rodgers
RB - Todd Gurley
RB - LaGarrette Blount
WR - Allen Robinson
WR - Rueben Randle
WR - Chris Givens
TE - Rob Gronkowski
K - Mike Nugent
DEF - Chiefs

***If you're new to FanDuel, follow this link and click the yellow tab in the top right corner, and put in promo code DIRK to get special savings and make me monies***

Enter The MILHOUSE League for Week 10 on FanDuel

Just one thing, Dude - do you have to use so many cuss words?

His Dirkness
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